maybe it wasn't that I had a lack of feeling for you. Maybe I had so much feeling that I didn't want to feel it and instead I buried it so I wouldn't feel it or notice it in an attempt to not get hurt so that you could hurt first because there is nothing in this world that could be worse than the powerless feeling that comes with someone else hurting you so maybe I actually liked you more than I could even say or feel or acknowledge as the truth.